


Hatred Of The Sea

by ThatSpongeBobKidMeme



Series: Hatred Of The Sea Universe [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Mai, Bisexual Sokka (Avatar), Bisexual Suki, But it's not the Main Ship, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gay Zuko (Avatar), Lesbian Azula (Avatar), M/M, Sokka Angst, Zuko (Avatar)-centric, Zuko Angst, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, asexual and biromantic toph, he does date mai, heterosexual katara (she's a good ally tho), hurt zuko, pansexual ty lee, pansexul aang, pretty much everything is the same except it's gayer, zukka is endgame folks dont worry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:55:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24856438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatSpongeBobKidMeme/pseuds/ThatSpongeBobKidMeme
Summary: "If people from the crew weren’t looking at him with narrowed eyes and suspicion, their expressions were mournful, eyebrows knitted together in sympathy. What caused this thirteen year old boy to be banished and injured? They’d think as he’d pass. But Zuko was no charity case. He was here for a reason, and he’d do anything to restore his honor."Or when Zuko has a lot of internalized homophobia and toxic masculinity from living in the Fire Nation his whole life, and Sokka (along with the rest of the gAang) have to show him the error of his ways.
Relationships: Aang & Zuko (Avatar), Aang/Katara (Avatar), Azula & Zuko (Avatar), Azula/Ty Lee (Avatar), Iroh & Zuko (Avatar), Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Mai/Zuko (Avatar), Sokka & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko
Series: Hatred Of The Sea Universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1799413
Comments: 6
Kudos: 86





	Hatred Of The Sea

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this is my first Zukka fic and I'm super excited! This was born because I couldn't find any slowburn/super long fics that had the angst I wanted, so i decided to write it myself :0 also forgive me if there are mistakes, I'm not super used to using AO3 yet so bear with me lol :3 Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Zuko hated the ocean. It was constantly moving, and seasickness only got worse and worse for the boy. That hatred only got greater the longer he was at sea.

The crew on his ship became weary of him as soon as the banished prince boarded the ship with his uncle in tow. They knew of him. Most of the crew had worked under Uncle Iroh when he was a general. But that wasn’t what bothered Zuko.

If people from the crew weren’t looking at him with narrowed eyes and suspicion, their expressions were mournful, eyebrows knitted together in sympathy. _What caused this thirteen year old boy to be banished and injured?_ They’d think as he’d pass. But Zuko was no charity case. He was here for a reason, and he’d do anything to restore his honor.

Zuko locked himself in his room after the first three days. His Uncle tried to persuade him to come and eat with the crew, but eventually settled to just letting Zuko take his supper in his room. Meanwhile, the boy’s mind raced as he tried to work. But how do you figure out a way to find a man who has been missing for almost 100 years? Though, Zuko is nothing if not determined.

* * *

Finally, two days and many burnt up maps later, Zuko finally emerged with a plan. A plan to find the Avatar.

He stretched a map over the biggest table in the ship’s main room. He’d called the ship’s captain, Lieutenant Jee, and his uncle to gather around the table. Apparently Jee’s second in command was with him, a teenager with long dark hair and pale skin. His eyes were thin, though not unusually so for a Fire Nation citizen, and the irises were a soft amber that did not fit the boy’s hard expression. Zuko adverts his eyes back to the map.

Red lines mark the route Zuko has planned, his finger pointing to the Western Air Temple as he starts to speak. “We’ll start at the Air Temples, going to the Western, Southern, Eastern, and then Northern. If we are unsuccessful there, we’ll start scouring the North and work our way down South. I expect for us to start our journey within the week.”

Zuko looked around at the men in the room. Lieutenant Jee was looking at Zuko with poorly hidden disapproval, while his second in command eyed Zuko with open frustration on his face. Iroh was at Zuko’s side, hands hidden beneath his robe sleeves. His response of approval was written all over his face as he glanced at his nephew. “I believe that is an excellent plan, Prince Zuko. We’ll stop at the nearest port and ready our supplies for the journey.” He said with a small smile, turning toward the ship’s Captain. “Does that sound alright, Lieutenant Jee?”

The man opened his mouth to speak, but was quickly cut off by his Second, a young firebender by the name of Su Jin. “And you really expect us to take you all across the world? To what, find the Avatar?” Zuko narrowed his unbandaged eye as the Second continued to speak. “Hate to break it to you, but the Avatar’s been gone for almost one hundred years! What makes you think you can find him?” The Lieutenant’s eyes were wide with disbelief at Su Jin’s words, and Uncle Iroh’s shoulders were tense as he waited for Zuko’s reaction.

The banished prince’s eye was closed, seeming to try and control his anger. Zuko took a deep breath, as if about to speak, but he stayed silent too long, and Su Jin’s patience had worn thin.

“And why do you still call him prince? He’s the prince of nothing! The Firelord made sure of that! So why the hell are we even listening to the stuck up brat? The Avatar is long dead, and if he isn’t then he’s hiding like a coward. He’s not worth the crew’s time or mine.” Su Jin said loudly, his face getting closer and closer to Zuko’s as he yelled. His arms were crossed, body language tense.

Something inside Zuko snapped.

The boy opened his eye, lip curling in a sneer. Zuko had a silent thought of _“he is very close_ ” and _“his eyes are very pretty”_ , before rage and wrath drowned out all his thoughts. His heart hammered in his skull as red started to cloud his vision.

His tone was down right menacing as he spoke. “The Avatar is alive, either as an Airbender or a Waterbender. I will tear this world apart brick by brick if necessary to get to him. And if he’s alive, _we’ll find him_. If you have a problem with that, _Su Jin_ ,” Zuko spat the name like a curse, “then you best get off this ship when we dock in the next few days. Because if I see an ounce of disrespect towards me or my uncle from you while we are on this ship, I will not hesitate to _throw you off it_.” Zuko bared his teeth. “Do we understand each other?” He snarled, and Zuko watched Su Jin’s throat bob as Su Jin gulped. He seemed to have not expected that type of reaction from someone so young.

The teenager nodded insistanly at the younger boy, fear causing his eyes to glaze over. He looked down to the floor, his hands clasping one another behind his back as he bowed in apology. “I-I apologize for an-any offense I caused.” Su Jin’s voice shaked as he talked, his gaze glued to the floor. Zuko looked to Lieutenant Jee, who’s eyes were wide, and his uncle, who was frowning. Zuko ignored Iroh, looking towards the Lieutenant. “See to it that your second is properly educated on how to speak to those of higher rank, Lieutenant. I expected better from the student of the man my uncle has raved about all these years.”

Zuko’s eye flickered to Su Jin, who has since stood up, then back to Jee. “We _will_ dock at the next port, we _will_ buy the supplies needed to survive a trip to the Western Air Temple, and you _will_ treat me and my uncle with respect while we travel together. Otherwise, Su Jin won’t be the only one of your crew thrown overboard.” Lieutenant Jee’s eyes widened even more, his mouth hanging open. Zuko looks away, fed up with the Lieutenant and his poor choice in second in command.

“I will retire to my room now.” He looked to his uncle. “Inform me when we reach land.” Iroh nodded, not looking at his nephew. Zuko decides to promptly ignore the guilt building up in him from Iroh’s disappointment.

It was his uncle’s fault they were in this situation at all. He was the one who let Zuko into the war room. If he’d just said no, Zuko would still be the heir to the throne, and would still have his father’s approval. The thought brings a renewed sense of bitterness to Zuko, his guilt now overshadowed by the rush of anger he feels towards his uncle.

He steps towards a hall that leads to the sleeping quarters. Just as he reaches the door, he turns to the men. The thirteen year old opens his mouth to say something, but shakes his head in anger before throwing open the door and leaving the main room.

It’s not until Zuko is sitting on the edge of his bed and his anger mostly dissipates that he finally lets himself breath.

His rage now gone, Zuko is left with only disappointment and guilt from the way Iroh looked at him. Spirits, why can’t he just do something right for once?! Zuko runs his hands over his face, wincing only slightly as his hand rubs against his bandages.

_I deserve this_. Zuko thinks. _I was never as good as Azula, never as talented or perfect. I’ll never be enough for_ him. _Not without the Avatar._ The boy doesn’t even realize that tears are about to fall until it’s too late, and one has glided down his cheek.

Zuko hurries to wipe it, because what if someone sees? Boys aren't supposed to cry, after all. But his efforts are in vain, for another tear is shed, and then another, and then another, until Zuko is left a blubbering mess, only crying out of one eye because the other is bandaged becausehisfatherburnedhisface _becauseZukocan’tdoanythingright._ He can’t even sit quietly and do as he’s told.

He’s a failure in every sense of the word. And now he has the most impossible job in the world, because Su Jin is right. How is he supposed to find someone that’s stayed hidden for 100 years? Neither Zuko’s father, grandfather, or great grandfather could find him. How can Zuko be so arrogant as to think he can?

It takes a while before Zuko’s eye is dry and he’s no longer crying.

Exhaustion weighs heavy on him, his eye drooping and fluttering closed every few minutes. Zuko knows he shouldn’t go to sleep this early, Uncle Iroh hasn’t even brought his dinner yet, but the thirteen year old boy is mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. He couldn’t have stayed awake even if he tried.

He falls asleep mere moments after he lays down. As Zuko slumbers, he lets his hatred towards the ocean be forgotten for a moment, the soft rocking of the waves lulling him into a deeper sleep as he pretends that it isn’t the sea rocking him, but his mother.

Zuko rests with nightmares plaguing him for the hundredth time since the Agni Kai with his father.


End file.
